Friendship

Friendship
Friendship, it just seems to happen. I mean for me, I’ve always been super terrible at making friends that aren’t of the opposite sex. I don’t know what it was, I just could not make friends with another girl. However, I have made a few friends that are girls. I have many acquaintances, I hate no one, but I enjoy very much my tight notch of friends. I am not sure what has drawn me to them or even made me want to stick around, but it happened. Honestly, I do have more guy friends, but the friendships that place the most value with me are the few friends I made that are girls. Perhaps because they’ve been able to relate more to me and we have a lot of common problems. Do not get me wrong, I value all my friendships and appreciate them, I just have more trouble thinking of how to live with out my friends that are girls. I have two best girl friends that have gotten me through more than I could even begin to thank them for. So, what is it that causes a friendship? People like to commonly say “it just happens”, that was my initial thoughts. Well, it’s more complex than we tend to believe. Obviously interaction is key, the more regular it is, the more likely you are to enter the friendship zone, but it’s more than that. There’s also the need to have things in common, that’s a key that gets us talking to one person we see regularly than another we see regularly. The switch from the train of acquaintances to the train of friendship happens at the Self-Disclosure station. The ability to share personal stuff with one another is when you first decide if you want to switch those trains, the more deep it gets, the closer you get to the train of friendship. Reciprocity is the true train jump, can the confide in you as you can them? That’s what distinguished friends from acquaintances. Now that you’ve reached the friendship train, what keeps them on board? Closeness and benefits for both sides of the friendship. Friendship keeps people happy and allows them to vent when they’re not. If we didn’t have someone to confide in, we’d build up everything, and eventually breakdown. Once you’re close enough to be considered ’besties’, the friendship becomes not on a physical interaction level but on a communication level. Friendship does not see distance as a problem but an obstacle. If it’s good enough, it will find ways, because no one wants to lose the person they trust and can find confinement in. We want to keep the things that benefit us and make us happy. It makes us better psychologically and healthier because of our positive psychology found in it. <3


Resources: http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200611/friendship-the-laws-attraction?page=3